Joy after the pain

I don't know how to start this blog post so I will begin with ...well, the beginning. Years ago, 22 to be exact, a phone call changed my life forever. I was going to have a new baby sister from my Dad's second marriage. Quite honestly, I was devastated and did not understand why he would want or need one more child. After all he had 5 healthy kids from my mom. I was in fact, still hurt from their divorce at that point 10 years earlier. Sounds ridiculous now...especially reading it on paper but the pain and confusion was very real and I didn't know how to cope. I am reminded daily in life even still that we don't always "get to know" why we are handed certain cards. Why do seemingly bad things have to happen that in the natural make no sense at all. Painful hard things...that we carry along in life. Visiting with good friends at a high school reunion reminded once again the year my parents divorced, the 62 days of school I missed that year, and my exit to boarding school the next year to escape the pain of that time in my life. Back to the phone call... a month after that call, I traveled to see my Dad in North Carolina...he would have my little sister with him. Nervously, I swallowed my hurt and made the trip not knowing what to expect. I still remember the moment I first held Hannah. It was one of the sweetest moments in my life because I felt the grace of God reach down and heal my heart....in less than a gasp of air. I was in love with this child...the sweetest face, the most perfect smile, and a heart that would accept me too, unconditionally. This past weekend she gave me a list of 48 reasons why she loved me. It means everything to me. My greatest pain is now one of my greatest joys. I LOVE YOU HANNAH! You are my grace angel.